You can feel the attraction immediately. You imagine the picture-perfect life together for many years ahead.  You’ve fallen hard, very hard ….

But wait! We’re not talking about your latest date but rather a home you saw while house hunting.

Yes, buying a home is like falling in love.

You can expect to go through the same ups and downs, emotional tugs and pulls, and even similar stages:

Being smitten, getting your heart broken, eventually learning from your mistakes, and becoming wiser and more serious on your quest for “love.”

All is fair in love and war … and house hunting! We’ll show you how to make the most of your journey in finding a home you love.

The One That Got Away

Everyone remembers the devastation of their first heart break. You feel a sense of loss, guilt, and extreme emotions on what you may or may not have done wrong.

Guess what? Buyers have that too.

Sometimes you have to lose out on a property you absolutely love before you can get serious (and braver) about home buying. Here’s what you can learn from going through this disappointment:

Don’t hesitate about your true feelings and be wishy-washy about your intentions.

What this means as a buyer: You must be ready to put a competitive offer in right away and be the utmost prepared with your maximum budget, financing, deal breakers BEFORE you begin house hunting. By going through this disappointing experience, you’ve also gained some additional self-awareness on what is really important to you in a home, and that you’ve got to open yourself up to negotiation and strategic tactics to seal the deal!

Learn to move on and keep searching.

What this means as a buyer: Use those feelings of regret as an advantage, and turn it into a positive. You now are a wiser, more seasoned buyer who better understands how the housing market really works in that particular neighborhood and price range.  Don’t waste time wallowing; dust yourself off and keep looking at homes since new inventory and listings will come on the market.

Don’t look back and don’t compare.

What this means as a buyer: What happens if you can’t get that master suite bathroom out of your mind from that last home. Or that awesome deck out back. You could go on and on comparing your first heart break with other homes. Stop. It. Immediately.  Go back and focus on your original list of must-haves, deal breakers, needs and wants. Or, tweak it if anything has changed and get back out there!

Don’t worry, you will fall in love again.

What this means as a buyer: Yes, you will find a home and be happy! Most buyers get over their heart break and find a home that works for them and their family.

Hopelessly Devoted to That Home

Do you believe in love at first sight? Or maybe have fallen in love with someone who might not have been the right choice.

Blinded by love or even desperation, we ignore any signs that this isn’t the one really for us.

The same thing can happen to homebuyers.  You could fall in love with a home or location that really isn’t a good match for you and your family.

Unfortunately, some buyers can get swayed by emotion and start to make irrational decisions, especially if a hectic housing market is causing them anxiety. 

Don’t be a fool in love. Some buyers get hung up on an amazing or gorgeous home that just wows them … but it really doesn’t fit their family’s needs at all (i.e., long commute to work, not enough bedrooms, too small or too big, too expensive, etc.).

Never settle for what doesn’t feel right.  Some buyers end up with a home that isn’t good enough for them. Yes, home buying does require some compromise, but this refers to ignoring blatant issues with a home that could cause regret later on. For example, they didn’t carefully consider some red flags about the home’s structure, workmanship, etc. This can happen when buyers want a home so badly in a certain neighborhood.

It’s times like this that you need to search for some clarity on your part to avoid falling too hard for the wrong home, whether you’re charmed by it or know it’s a dud.

Fall in Love with the Right Home

You can fall in love with a home that works for you, for most of your needs, for you budget, and for your lifestyle. Buying a home is full of emotion, and keeping your heart and head in sync can save you a lot of heart ache down the road.

Get your priorities straight. We can’t stress this enough but make a list of your must-haves and your deal breakers and stick to it!  Don’t be lured by a “hot” looking home when all it might lead to heartbreak down the road for short-term bliss.  

Know what’s best for you. Only you know what will work for you and your family. It’s your life so don’t listen or be swayed by what your friends have to say.  Keep your emotions in check as much as possible and make rational and smart decisions based on what is best for you and your family.

See—buying a home IS like falling in love after all and you can think of me as your personal matchmaker.   Email me even if you are just in the thinking-of-buying stage. I like to start talking with my clients well before they are ready to start looking at homes…we’ve got some work to do before you start going on dates…in this case to see houses 😉